Entering Vienna

Have lost a few stories but will step ahead and then go backwards, which is ok for me. I have had to book an appointment with my personal physician Dr. Handsie Sorebutt, this other famous Viennese doctor who has become world famous by giving Zumba lessons in leiderhosien. Handsie comes into see me, he is very stiff and walks with a very short staccato stride and wears a monocle in his left eye. Are you ok Handsie l ask him he tells me that he has just been chewing a toffee. He produces a 78rpm well worn record. Dah ah Dah ah Dah  Dee Dee Deet deet. Handsie in a frenzy starts slapping himself all over. Thighs feet and of course rear end. I have to copy this. We end like whirIng Dervishes with Handsie giving two hard slaps across the face and charging me 20 Euros.l ask for a receipt and Handsie  barges another 10 Euros. Handsie may be Austrian but he knows how to charge like the US. I am not sure if this treatment will be covered by Blue Cross but it works.